DEAR GRANDDADDY- A Teen, Parent, and Educator Advice Column BLOG #11

Dear Granddaddy, my girlfriend just broke up with me, and now everyone thinks I’m a loser. Eric V. – teen loser.

Bestselling and award-winning author, speaker, educator, and TV host.


Eric, my heart aches for you, but, not entirely because of the break up… It aches because you don’t understand yet that the break up isn’t that important. I am not trying to be insensitive or cruel here, just trying to get you to look at the bigger picture. Five years from now, no one will care who dated whom, who broke up with whom, or who was popular in high school.

You’ll be in completely different life circumstances in five years. This means that no one will know who was considered cool in school, or, anyone’s dating history. And as for the few of your old schoolmates who are still around, they will neither remember nor care.

You’re probably saying to yourself, “But I’m hurting now, not five years from now. My classmates are looking at me now like a loser.” You might also be thinking that you love her, miss her, and can’t live without her. Well, I’m here to tell you that you’re going to be fine.

You have been given an opportunity to work on something that is going to help you live a happier and more successful adult life. It’s called social emotional intelligence. Your first lesson is to learn that artificial rules and standards many popular high school kids create are irrelevant, especially after high school. Another is that girlfriends come and go, and that’s how it’s supposed to be. Sometimes you have to find out what you don’t want in order to discover what you do want.

Furthermore, time dulls all pain. Have patience and allow some time to pass. In time and space, things have a way of finally working out. Plus, in time you’ll learn a lot on this journey called life.

In conclusion, Eric, it’s all good. It really is! What you’re feeling right now won’t last. Be socially emotionally intelligent and remember that tough times don’t last, but tough people do. And Eric, you’re tough, smart and worthy enough.

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 Dan Blanchard is an award-winning author, speaker, and educator who has appeared on over 100 television and radio shows. To find out more about Dan or to submit a question to him, please visit him on his website at: