DEAR GRANDDADDY- A Teen, Parent, and Educator Advice Column BLOG #35

Dear Granddaddy, I can’t stand it when I see parents who don’t watch their kids. Jessica B- Mad Mom  

Bestselling and award-winning author, speaker, educator, and TV host.


Hey, Jessica. I would say that today most of us parents really do watch our kids. In some cases, we maybe even watch them a little too much. In contrast, though, some parents are more “old-school,” and don’t appear to be watching their children at all.

There are pros and cons to each style of parenting and I’m sure that proponents of each style annoy the other. The looser, old-fashioned style of parenting usually ends up with more bumps and bruises while fostering self-discovery, self-initiation, and independence. These traits are all good things that develop from this style of parenting as long as it’s done out of deliberate love and planning.

But it’s not okay when parents use this style as an excuse to be selfish and lazy. It’s not okay when they expect other adults to be responsible for their children. And it’s not okay when their child gets hurt, and they become annoyed that their kid is bothering them with their bumps and bruises. Again, teaching independence is great, but failure to parent is not great. In fact, it’s bad.

However, just as there are some good and bad things with the old-school style of parenting, there are good and bad things about the new-school style, too. I’m sure the old-school looks at the new-school of parents as uptight and fostering helpless children.

Heck, I think I might even be a little guilty of being one of those parents who does too much for their kids. This becomes obvious when I ask my kids to do a simple thing and I see utter confusion on their faces.

So, in conclusion, Jessica. I think it’s wise that we all keep an open mind towards other parenting styles. And if we do feel like the looser parents are taking advantage of us, then instead of getting angry, we need to nicely share with them our concerns so that they, too, can be more aware of what their child is doing. Okay?

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Dan Blanchard is an award-winning author, speaker, and educator who has appeared on over 100 television and radio shows. To find out more about Dan or to submit a question to him, please visit him on his website at: