DEAR GRANDDADDY- A Teen, Parent, and Educator Advice Column BLOG #54

Dear Granddaddy, why can’t I move out of my home? I’m 16 and ready to go! Xavier- student

Bestselling and award-winning author, speaker, educator, and TV host.


Xavier, you sound like a very determined young man with a strong will, who will most likely do some pretty impressive things in your lifetime when you are given the chance.

Now I don’t know for sure what kind of home environment you are living in right now, but, I imagine it is probably similar to the challenging one that I grew up in. Many of us young people who find ourselves growing up in these challenging times are usually in a hurry to get out on our own.

Sadly, many people mistakenly think that life’s circumstances determine who they become. I think that it is our life decisions that create the lives we end up with as adults.

You see, it’s not our circumstances or things that we can’t control, it’s our choices, which we can control, that matter the most. Perhaps you want to get away from whatever you’re facing at home, but the law won’t let you. That is your life circumstance right now. So, what are you going to do about it? And don’t you dare tell me, “Run away!”

Can you somehow create a better home environment? If not, can you develop skills to help yourself better cope with what you’re going through so that you can someday help others in similar circumstances? Can you increase your knowledge and skills so that when you do move out and are on your own, you’ll be able to make it independently, and not be forced to move back home? Will you take the lessons you learned living at home and apply them when you are a father, so your kids love living with you?

You might have heard, Xavier, that there is a silver-lining in every cloud. Well, I believe there is. No matter what our life circumstances are, there are still opportunities for us to learn something that could make our lives better down the road. Hang in there, Xavier. It gets better. Hey, it did for me!

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Dan Blanchard is an award-winning author, speaker, and educator who has appeared on over 100 television and radio shows. To find out more about Dan or to submit a question to him, please visit him on his website at: